MY GRANDAD THE WORLD’S GREATEST SECRET AGENT!

I wonder if my granny knows,
What my grandad does or where he goes,

But my grandad went and blew his cover,
When he told me and my little brother,

You see my grandad is the worlds very best,
Secret agent better then all the rest,

He’s told us tales of where he’s been,
And of how he protects the queen,

He’s big and strong with dashing looks,
And armed with gadgets to help catch the crooks,

Like springs in his boots to help him jump high,
And a super jet pack so my grandad can fly,

But I think the coolest thing by far,
Is his secret agent car,

It looks the same as every other,
But I know different and so does my brother,

The windows and doors are bullit proof,
And it fires rockets from the roof,

And there’s even a button by his feet,
That operates the ejector seat,

but the coolest thing i’ve ever seen,
Is the car turn into a submarine,

I think the reason for this must be,
So that he can fight villains under the sea,

Like a monster jellyfish, or a robotic shark,
Or maybe a gigantic octopus that lurks in the dark,

Or maybe its so he can get to his undersea lab,
And work on new ways of defeating Dr Crab,

But whether fighting bad guys on land or under the sea,
My grandad will always mean the world to my brother and me…..

THE END

MY FEARLESS LITTLE PIRATE BROTHER

In the pirate world there is no other,
More fearless then my little pirate brother,

With his pirate hat and his pirate dagger,
His wooden leg and his pirate swagger,

He sails the sea’s for the pleasure,
Of discovering new pirate treasure,

His motley crew stand by his side,
For what could be a bumpy ride,

First of all there’s cannonball Frank,
Who will make you walk the plank,

And barnacle Bill the captains cook,
Who catches fish by using his hook,

Sn oozy Sam sleeps up high in the crows nest,
For its the best place on the ship to get some rest,

And when the crew finnish eating their grub,
Colin the cabin boy is at hand to give the dishes a scrub,

And not forgetting Polly the parrot,
She’s bright orange just like a carrot,

This band of pirates are no fools,
For they share in their quest for precious jewels,

My little pirate brother is in command,
As he steers the ship towards dry land,

I wonder what adventures lie in store,
Says my little pirate brother as he lands on shore,

And with the treasure map in hand,
The crew set off across the sand,

And soon enough they fear the worst,
Another pirate gang reached the treasure first,

It looks like the adventure has come to an end,
With no gold coins or jewels for the crew to spend,

But Polly the parrot has a different view,
She flies down from the sky and squawks to the crew,

SQUAWK don’t panic their digging in the wrong place,
And a smile creeps over my little pirate brothers face,

Whilst Polly was flying high in the sky,
An X on the ground she did spy,

For what the other pirate gang had forgot,
Is X always marks the correct spot,

My little pirate brother got his treasure chest,
And with his crew sails home to get some rest…

THE END

Setting up a fly fishing reel. Learn about fly fishing equipment, poles, and supplies in this free video. Expert: Alvin Dedeaux Contact: www.alvindedEaux.com Bio: Alvin has been a fly fishing guide and casting instructor for 12 years, and has been fly fishing for 32 years. He is a graduate of the Joan Wulff fly casting instructor’s school. Filmmaker: MAKE | MEDIA

DIET TIP:
Lose weight quickly by eating raw pork or rancid tuna. The subsequent food poisoning/diarrhea will enable you to lose 12 pounds in only 2 days.
FINANCE TIP: Save on electricity by turning off all the lights in your house and walking around wearing a miner’s hat.
FINANCE TIP: Save on gasoline by pushing your car to your destination. Invariably passers-by will think you’ve broken down and help.
HOUSEHOLD TIP: Drill a one inch diameter hole in your refrigerator door. This will allow you to check that the light goes off when the door is closed.
HOUSEHOLD TIP: Old telephone directories make ideal personal address books. Simply cross out the names and address of people you don’t know.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: At work, put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over their caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: Buy a television set exactly like your neighbors. Then annoy them by standing outside their window and changing their channel using your identical remote control.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: During rush hour, sit in your parked car and point a hair dryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: Fool other drivers into thinking you have an expensive car phone by holding an old TV or video remote control up to your ear and occasionally swerving across the road.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: Putting just the right amount of gin in your goldfish bowl makes the fishes’ eyes bulge and causes them to swim in an amusing manner.
INEXPENSIVE ENTERTAINMENT: When the money comes out the ATM, scream "I won!" "I won!" "3rd time this week!"
PARKING TICKETS: Avoid parking tickets by leaving your wipers turned to ‘fast wipe’ whenever you leave your car parked illegally.
PERSONAL HYGEINE: No time for a bath? Wrap yourself in masking tape and remove the dirt by simply peeling it off.
SAFETY TIP: Never attempt to fasten your shoe laces in a revolving supermarket door.
TRAVELING TIP: Avoid the need to pack bulky shampoo bottles, which can leak in your suitcase, by arranging for the whole family to have ’skinhead’ haircuts a day or two before departure.
TRAVELING TIP: When out driving always turn left. Then, should you become lost, you can find your way home by reversing the procedure and always turning right.

In order to make a fly fishing leader after a pre-made leader has broken, try tying a double surgeon’s knot to the butt end. Discover how a leader should get lighter as it moves away from the butt end with help from a fly fishing guide in this free video on making a fly fishing leader. Expert: Walt Geryk Contact: neffguide.com Bio: Walt Geryk is an Orvis-endorsed fly and spey fishing guide with over 30 years of experience. Filmmaker: Christian Munoz-Donoso

Hi,

I’ve just moved to the South East coast (Margate) and would like to start sea fishing, probably from a pier or rocks.

I’m a complete beginner to sea fishing and have nearly no money to spend on equipment (I can probably just about afford some new line and terminal tackle).

Would my 10ft Margin rod or 12ft Feeder be any good to get me going for now? And will my budget reels be up to the job? I’m only looking to catch smaller fish such as mackrel to start with….

Thanks,

Matt

Just and old rod and reel of my great grandfathers, wondering if anyone knows anything about them. The rod is 6′6″ and is made especially for fluking from piers because it has a very sensitive tip and a much sturdier butt end.

I recently purchased a Blue Fox game spin rod 9 1/2 by Normark. i’m into fishing but not sure if this rod I just bought for £6 is any good. I cant seem to be able to find it anywhere on the net and was wondering if anyone can shed any light on what its worth and wether its a half decent rod to begin spinning with. thanks

Well, I’ve just met a Jesus denier, which I figure is much worst. This ‘Person’ refuted the fact that our Lord’s son walked on a lake of wine and fishes. Sed it was a misinterpetation like many in the holy book. I hit him in the hed with a stone and intend to interogit him furthar wen he comes around.

Tippet isn’t added to fly fishing line, but it is attached to leaders with an improved surgeon’s knot. Learn about tying tippets to leaders, tightening and reducing friction with help from an experienced fly fisherman in this free video on fly fishing equipment. Expert: Steve Oxley Contact: www.DenverAngler.com Bio: Steve Oxley has been fly fishing for 50 years. He works at a fly fishing shop owned by Rick Typher called the Denver Angler. Filmmaker: Clay Roberts

I’ve boon looking for a book that would include comprehensive information as well as colourful photos of variety of species of all animals, fish, birds, flowers, trees, butterflies and every living thing that either exist or used to exist in this world. I mean something like an encyclopedia.